Monday, December 21, 2009

Some Christmas Ham

Christmas is here. Who doesn’t feel a little insane and vulnerable? A blizzard up the coast. Bank accounts echoing that hollow sound. Health care hanging on like a precarious ornament, hooked at the tip of a bough, waiting to be pushed closer to the trunk of the tree. Unemployment in the double digits. Divorce rates surging. Depression, anxiety, and all these war movies! ENOUGH!

And it is even harder for those who have sensitive constitutions.

(Side note: My tombstone is going to read: MY SINUSES NEVER FELT BETTER!)

What remains, always, is the human spirit. Though it may not be perfect, in fact, since it is completely imperfect (and often given over to addiction, need, self destruction and showiness), I give you, well, Judy. Let her take on all your fears and tribulations. Why not? She’s already dead and she can’t feel a thing.

So, put down that fifth of whiskey, stop your worrying, for at least three minutes, and give it up for some Christmas-Judy-toward-the-end. (Thanks, Jeff.) You know you’re way better off than she was, even though she was way more talented than you. Be grateful.

Merry Krissmax.

2010 is your year.

Yours in all,


Rebecca Waring said...

I truly hate the holidays and feel like I need medication. But every now and then something magical happens and I go all soft and woo-woo. Like I'll hear Silent Night or see something about Jesus and the Nativity and how there was this HUGE spiritual shift 2000 years ago that encouraged everyone to be more loving. I think we are going through something similar right now. Peace on Earth.

Tandava (Carol Henning) said...

Wow... lovely and heartbreaking.

the last noel said...

A truly awesome video.